Dear Top Ranked Pirate Corporation,
How do I even begin to express how deeply sorry I am for all of the bad things that I have done, the words, the images, the videos, that have hurt your feelings over the past seven months? It seems that I must sincerely ask for your patience and understanding as I work back from the very beginning.
Once, long ago, I was a soldier in the darker reaches of Null Security space. I had gone to Null the first week I played Eve and had spent two years fighting other people's wars. I knew nothing of Low Security space or the people that played there. But slowly and surely I began to hear of a group of players that had fun playing Eve, a group that dared to fly Solo, but who would come to a fellow player's aid when needed. My path took me in a different direction, to Syndicate and eventually to my own Corporation.
When we finally moved in to a nearby system, I finally had the chance to fly with you. For eighteen months I flew often with some great pilots in both your corp and in Shadow. We had many great gangs of insanity on those Sunday night roams. And we also fought, but the fights were good fights. And I admired your Code from afar.
When my life, my business and my Corporation began to finally fall apart around me, it was you that I chose to fly with. I ignored invitations from everyone else in New Eden and made my home with you. I didn't play much at first, so many other things having become a priority in my life. But when I did, I learned a lot from all of you. From what I considered to be great pilots. I no longer had to look up to you, I was a part of you. I believed.
I realize now that I must have done something to warrant your anger. My Irish blood can be stubborn and pig-headed at times, I'm rather notorious for it. So I can sympathize with your dilemma, you must have felt no other alternative but to banish me from your ranks. I tried to apologize then, but my words obviously failed me. So I tried to walk away quietly, but I was foolish and let the voices of a few dozen members sway me into making a stand. I was used for other people's gain, I realize that now. I feel like such a fool.
None of that is an excuse for what I did next. And I know now just how much hurt, pain and suffering I've caused you since then. My decision to build an old-school Solo and Small Gang Corporation in the station next to yours must have seemed to you the actions of an angry man, and for that, I do sincerely apologize. Our group of lay-back newbies and true solo pilots must have seemed like a darkening storm cloud of insult to your very existence, and I can honestly assure you that was never my intention.
You have every right to War Dec us, station camp us, follow us around New Eden, smart bomb our pods, write Anonymous comments on my blog and killboard insulting me and dragging me through the mud, I deserve it. God knows I deserve much, much worse. All I want is to make you feel better, to calm your nerves and to prostrate myself before you. And humbly, sincerely, and with all my heart, ask for your forgiveness.
Please forgive me for telling everyone you are a Bully, when clearly it is me that has acted like one. All those horrible things I've done, what ever possessed me? I have seen the error of my ways and am a changed man. I promise.
Please forgive me for calling Meebz a bad pilot. That one throw away line buried deep within a post was uncalled for and mean-spirited. The context isn't important, words hurt and I know that now. Can you find it within your expansive heart to forgive me?
Please forgive me for all the times in the last seven months that I've derped myself into you. I foolishly thought that if only you could kill me a few dozen times, it might satisfy your anger and make you feel better. But I was foolish, certainly my crimes against you demand far more sacrifice. I am prepared.
Please forgive me for building a great and successful 150 man Old-School Pirate Corporation in your System. My God, what was I thinking!?! I can only imagine how badly this must have pierced your soul and cause you such extreme anguish. I promise to stop kicking your spies and to publicly announce our ops so that you have time to mobilize to another region and properly set-up your black ops gangs.
Like I said before, I am sorry. And I am prepared to make the ultimate sacrifice to prove my sincerity. If, as I suspect, my actions have indeed caused you to feel bullied, picked on, or otherwise hurt in any way... I will quit Eve.
If that is what it takes... if that is what you want... if me being in local causes you such anguish, such pain and suffering, then I will be a man and go. I never wanted to hurt you.
Gosh darn it, that was the last thing I wanted.
I am humbled. You were right all along. I see that now. The darkness in my soul has consumed me. I fear for my eternal.
I must pay.
>sniff<
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